The Infinite Lives of Ryan Fitzpatrick

I first heard the term "Fitz-magic" on Sept. 25th, 2011. Trailing 21-0 early in the second quarter the Buffalo Bills scored 34 points to beat the New England Patriots for the first time in the previous sixteen contests between the two teams. Ryan Fitzpatrick led a roaring comeback that too often looked like it would come up short to the average Bills fan. Things looked headed for the standard heartbreak finish when Brady led a six play lightning quick drive to tie the game at 31. This came directly after the Bills had taken their first lead of the game on the previous drive. I remember texting my brother that we were indeed going to choke away a victory to the Patriots yet again. My optimism against New England was long expired at that point due to stupid kickoff fumbles, unsportsmanlike penalties at the most inopportune time and countless blowouts over the years. I was proven wrong only a few short minutes later when Ryan Fitzpatrick led a three play drive into easy field goal range, a penalty on Vince Wilfork made the kick even easier and enabled the Bills to bleed the clock nearly dry before kicking the game winning field goal.

It was the second time in just as many weeks that the Bills erased an 18 point or greater deficit to win a game and only the third time in as many previous seasons. The Bills were 3-0 and atop the AFC East for the first time in years. Needless to say the slumbering city of Buffalo that had been in victory hibernation since the days of Jim Kelly and Andre Reed were beyond ready to declare the start of their next dynasty. A few short weeks after this victory it appeared the Bills front office team felt the same way as they signed Fitzpatrick to a $59 million dollar contract over six years with $24 million in guaranteed money. Sadly that Patriots victory was the third in a season where the Bills started 3-0 but went on to finish 6-10. A similar story to the previous years and several years to follow as well. What was most remarkable about these first three wins was the level of Fitzpatrick's performance. For someone who had already been a journeyman backup QB with two other teams over four of the previous six years, he was winning games in breathtaking fashion and putting up all star level stats. He won multiple Offensive Player of the Week awards and even the September Offensive Player of the Month award. A Harvard graduate and the first alumnus of the Crimson to start as an NFL quarterback, his star was clearly on the rise. Sure it came crashing back to earth like all too many ill conceived Russian space crafts but before that he ignited a franchise's fan base, earned the nickname Amish Rifle and inspired the term "Fitz-magic." But what was Fitz-magic? Was it truly the comeback victories? Because both of those faded fast on numerous occasions. I have a different theory and feel there is finally enough evidence to back it up.

The real "Fitz-magic" is that when he joins a team he is able to make the current starting quarterback magically disappear, for varying lengths of time. While one such happening of this would be an oddity and two a coincidence, the seven such scenarios I'll describe to you prove this is a pattern of some power in the universe interceding on Ryan's behalf to get or keep him in the starting lineup.

2005-2007 St. Louis Rams - Jamie Martin

Eleven weeks into his first season, the first instance of Fitz-magic abracadabra-ed Ryan into the starting QB role. Jamie Martin left a 24-3 deficit game injured and Fitzpatrick came in and led the Rams to a 33-27 overtime win that won him his first start as an NFL QB the following week. He lost that job a couple weeks later and did not play a meaningful snap until 2008.

2007-2009 Cincinnati Bengals - Carson Palmer

In his first full season as a Cincinnati Bengal, 2008, it took only four games before Carson Palmer suffered the Fitz-magic bug bite that sent him to the bench and continued the downward trajectory of a 4-11-1 season for the Bengals. No comeback magic wins to speak of in that stretch but Fitzy was the starter for the rest of the season.

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2009-2013 Buffalo Bills - Trent Edwards

Trent Edwards suffered his first dose of Fitz-magic week six of the 2009 season and watched as Ryan led the Bills to a 16-13 overtime win against the Jets. He finished the season 5-4 as a starter and won the support of new coach Chan Gailey in 2010, after Edwards used up his extremely short leash by starting 0-2. A 4-9 record as a starter did not deter Chan Chan the Gailey man from sticking with him in 2011 and I already shared that season's results. A year later and the Chan-Patrick project ended...in Buffalo anyway. Believe it or not I always felt that we were a half decent pass rusher and one more threatening wide out (we only had Stevie Johnson and then the failed T.O. experiment) away from being a real playoff contender during the Gailey-Fitz era. I loved rooting for that team because they would always show up and occasionally pull off amazing wins. They'd also occasionally confound and gut punch you but what Bills team didn't? So lets remember the good times, like this play from that win over the Pats.

2013-2014 Tennessee Titans - Jake Locker

Three quarters into his fourth game as a starter Jake Locker was injured against the Jets and guess who was waiting in the wings? The Amish Rifle was locked and loaded. I tweeked the lyrics of Pilot's "Magic" (1974) to serve as the proper intro for Ryan, enjoy the video below with my adapted chorus.

Oh, ho, ho

Fitz-magic, you know

startin' to believe, it is so

Fitz-magic, you know

starting QBs, they just go

In his Titan's debut off the bench Fitzpatrick handly defeated the Jets and started 9 of the remaining 11 games going 3-6 as a starter. Once again plenty of playing time after taking over the starting job but no miracle comebacks and few wins of which to speak. This was the point where I started to really believe in my Fitz-magic theory.

2014-2015 Houston Texans - Ryan Mallett

After a turbulent off season for the Texans and overpaying for an unproven Brady backup Houston's new coach, Bill O'Brien named Fitzy the starter. Then, as he's so accustomed to doing, he changed his mind about his starting QB heading into the bye week after a 4-5 start for the magic man. Even sharing a first name seemed to provide no protection against the first string QB curse. Two games after the bye week Ryan Mallett tore his pectoral muscle and just like that Fitzpatrick was back at starter before the end of the same month in which he lost the job. Sadly, he too suffered his first major professional career injury two weeks later, ending his season with a fractured tibia.

2015-2017 New York Jets - Geno Smith

A combination of last ditch efforts by Rex Ryan to assemble a semi-competent offense reunited Fitzpatrick with former head coach Chan Gailey who was the acting Offensive Coordinator for the Jets in 2015. In his most impressive single bout of Fitz-magic he was hardly in the door in New York, before a locker room incident led to then starter Geno Smith's jaw, being dislocated by the fist of a teammate and consequently handed the reins to Ryan for week 1. He performed well enough to maintain the job all season despite some bumps and missed quarters along the way. He led the Jets to his best season record as a starter at 10-6 but missed the playoffs thanks to a pitiful performance in a season finale return to Buffalo. Fitzy threw three costly interceptions in the fourth quarter as the Jets lost 22-17 and the Bills helped the Steelers clinch the 6th seed and feasted on Primanti Bros sandwiches courtesy of the steel city fans. Despite his seeming penchant for blowing the big game and seemingly sending Rex to my beloved Bills (karma I guess) the Jets signed Fitzy to a one year $12 million fully guaranteed contract. 2016 is the quintessential Fitz-magic season and here's why:

-Five and a half games in Fitz was benched for Geno Smith and as had become the custom that was the kiss of death for Geno. The next week Smith suffered a season ending injury against the Baltimore Ravens and Fitzpatrick's Fitz-magic had him starting again.

-Fitzpatrick started the next two games before missing one due to injury.

-He returned as starter for the next two games following the missed one but was benched for Bryce Petty during the second half of a game against the Colts.

-Petty was then named the starter for the final four games of the season as new coach Todd Bowles wanted to see what the rookie could do. Even Petty had to know that was not going to end well.

-Petty was replaced by Fitz following an injury in two of the next three games and following the second injury Fitz was named the starter for a remarkable fourth time in the same season for the finale game which he won.

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This season is a microcosm of what Fitz-magic truly is, a curse upon the starting QB's availability for whatever team rosters the Harvard Hero. He was benched not once, not twice, not even thrice but four times! Four times and he still managed to somehow be the starter for a majority of the teams games that year including bookending the season as the starter; a truly magical feat. At this point no one could really deny the theory I'm selling here but we also know a shockingly high number of people still believe "dinosaurs didn't exist" so allow me to present my final pieces of evidence.

2017-Present Tampa Bay Buccaneers - Jameis Winston

Last season Winston missed four total games due to a shoulder injury and a few quarters here and there from other scrapes and bruises along the way. The Bucs finished with five wins and Fitzpatrick had two of them as a starter. He also did everything he could to stage an epic comeback from being down 31-0 to Arizona in week six when Jameis left with the shoulder injury, but fell short; the game ended 38-33.

The latest chapter in the Fitz-magic curse saga has already impacted the approaching season. On March 9th, 2018 Ryan Fitzpatrick signed a one year extension contract with the Bucs. Three months later the NFL finally got around to passing down sanctions for a March 2016 incident where Winston groped a female Uber driver without consent. So now Fitzy is the starter for presumably the first three games. Those games in order are at New Orleans, home for Philadelphia and home for Pittsburgh. Here's a fun thought what if Tampa Bay is shockingly 3-0 after that stretch? They would be headed into a week 4 matchup at Chicago before their bye. Would Fitz get Dirk Koetter's vote of confidence until the week 5 bye when he can reassess Winston's readiness? Koetter is quite obviously starting this season on the hot seat so would he want to rock the boat to the start of a successful and unexpected campaign? While this scenario is highly unlikely you and I and everyone who has now read this post know what is not; any scenario where Jameis comes back in and either through injury or off field incident ends up unavailable and who subs in for him? The one crowds once called the Amish Rifle. I still call him that and I'm not going to lie, I still root for him every time he starts a game, unless its against my Bills.

Oh, ho, ho

Fitz-magic, you know

startin' to believe, it is so

Fitz-magic, you know

starting QBs, they just go

Let's just hope however the Bucs season ends this year, that Fitzpatrick finishes his career out with the Patriots. Because, at this point, the Fitz-magic curse may be the only thing that can get that Kale eating, snake oil peddling, smug, Trump touting, Hall of Fame QB off the field before he's fifty. Keep slingin' it and abstaining from shaving Fitzy!